Brainy Bistro

Our Halloween Tradition

I was just reading Kerri’s post over at Play Library regarding her son’s costume.   I bring this to your attention because she and I have totally different problems.   While her son spends the entire fall wanting to wear his costume, even if its torn to shreds on Halloween.   My children want nothing to do with their costume - even on Halloween.

I realize that like many things my quirky little boys are in the minority.   So we have had a unique Halloween tradition develop It involves a long, drawn out build-up that finally culminates in the most ludicrous threat you have ever heard.    Let me walk you through it….

Sometime over the summer, my children decided what they want "to be" for Halloween.  My older son actually decided last Halloween but that’s an entirely different story.   Even when they were toddlers, I started asking them by September.  You see, I need ample time to make or purchase a costume.  I’ve come up with the following formula.  It takes me 4 weeks to think about making the costume, 1 week to purchase supplies, 2 weeks to stare at the supplies sitting on my counter and one hour to unsuccessfully construct the costume.  Five minutes to call my mother for advice.  One more week to consider the her solution.  One hour, the night before Halloween, to finally fix the costume.  I know you are impressed with my efficiency.

But the fun doesn’t start until mid-October, when I attempt to try parts of the costumes on the little rascals.  When I approach them with the costume and lots of spirited enthusiasm,  I always get a fierce "No."   I calmly explain that the costume will need adjusting before Halloween.   I add that I will only take one minute of their valuable time.  My older son always responds, "No way! Never!"   Keeping my frustration in check, I say, "If you don’t try the costume on, it may not be ready for Halloween."   "NO!"   At this point, I emphatically say, "Fine.  You let me know when you are ready to try it on.  But remember, if you don’t have a costume on Halloween, you don’t go trick-or-treating."  At that point, I give up.   No big deal.  I still have two week left.  

Over the next two weeks, they never approach me about the costume.  However, they have absolutely no problem announcing to the world what they are going "to be."   I don’t understand why the task of trying on a costume is so repulsive to them.  They love putting on play clothes.  Its not unusual to for Sharkboy to walk around in full Fireman’s uniform, only to disappear and reappear in a knight’s uniform.  Lavaboy, not to be outdone, walks around with a cowboy hat, bandana and pirate’s patch.  So why is it that they find it so intrusive to try on their Halloween costume– a costume of their choosing.    Moreover, this costume is their ticket to a virtual candy land and to staying out late.  

When they were younger, I just stuck any soft baby costume on them.  Now, there are elements of the costume that must be measured and fitted.   Usually by Halloween, I do manage to get the costumes adjusted.  I have learned to surreptitiously perform the necessary measurements.  One method I have used is to play the game, "Let’s measure" in which they use rulers to measure furniture while I use a tape measure to measure them.  This year, thus far, I coerced Sharkboy into trying on his brother’s ghost "poncho."   Luckily, they are close enough in size for me to make a decent judgement.  Keep in mind, Sharkboy has yet to try on his own Darth Vader costume.  

When the actual day comes, they’ve  both got a costume.   Donning my own witch hat, I announce that its time to put on our costumes and trick-or-treat.  And, right on cue, both of them refuse.  I lovingly remind them that people will not give candy to children without costumes.   By the third time, that calm rational reminder has become, "NO COSTUME!  NO CANDY!"   They begrudgingly start dressing, while simultaneously staring at our bowl of Reeces and Snickers.  By the time we reach the first house, the costumes are fully on.   By the time we reach the fifth house, the costumes are half-off.   

For this reason alone, I will be submitting last year’s photos to the Halloween contest.  While I’m sure that both my little ghost and miniature Darth Vader will be winners.   I won’t have photos of them until October 31st at 6:00pm.  Moreover, I’ve got to act quickly.   If I fumble with the camera too long,  I’ll only have a photo of two boys in plain sweat outfits - one white and one black.  Hey, worse comes to worse, I could always tell everyone that they are piano keys, chess pawns, salt & pepper or a couple of misplaced zebra stripes.    They’d get some candy for that, right?